


Content

by life_not_knife



Category: SHINee
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-05
Updated: 2015-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-30 05:33:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5152178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/life_not_knife/pseuds/life_not_knife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'With each step towards the other, Jonghyun's legs became jelly and yet his footing was still light and cautious.'</p>
            </blockquote>





	Content

**Author's Note:**

> First posted on: 18/10/2014 at my LJ.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-  
There was no mistaking the hunched figure in the shadows. As the wind swirled around him in a possessive and claustrophobic manner, Jonghyun inched closer towards the younger boy's small frame.  
  
His body was shaking as he sat under the tree, dark tresses of hair spilled out the front of his hooded jacket and his fingers played with the small pieces of loose string on his sleeves.  
  
With each step towards the other, Jonghyun's legs became jelly and yet his footing was still light and cautious.  
  
“Kibum-ah?” the older boy said in almost a whisper, he was still a few feet away from the trembling boy but the eeriness of the area and the late hour made his voice carry much louder on the wind.  
  
He saw a distinct tense in the other's spine and shoulders and he realised that Kibum must have heard him. Yet, the younger boy gave no reply as he sat stiffly still staring at the grass beneath his shins and marvelled in the sounds of the fish swimming deep within the lake that lay only a few inches from his shoe-less feet.  
  
The younger boy felt as Jonghyun approached and sat down beside him on the damp and muddy grass. The leaves rustled in the wind and it seemed as if nature was tormenting him in its stillness. The symphony of mother nature played around him in the now deserted park and he hated it with all of his might.  
  
Why was he here? He could have gone to a bar and hit the alcohol, could have gone to a club and danced until he collapsed... he could have done a number of things in order to drown out the voices in his head and yet, here he was … surrounded by a dark calmness. He didn't know who he was lying to anymore; he realised the one reason why he was here, why he would ALWAYS choose to come here, even if he could live this moment another million times.  
  
Jonghyun...  
  
The older boy knew where to find him here, and that is why he chose the silence of the night and the thoughts in his brain.  
  
“I told them” he finally croaked out and he heard the older boy release a deep breath, maybe one of slight relief that he was actually talking.  
  
“I told them everything … about work, about how I feel and about you.” Kibum said with a small sniffle and he raised his head for the first time in about half an hour. He gazed out into the pitch black lake that no longer resembled anything like water; it looked as if he could jump in and just disappear forever. He would, his family no longer cared – he could jump in without even a seconds thought if it wasn't for Jonghyun. It was always for the older boy, the reason why he confessed everything tonight, the reason why he came to this park and the reason why he wasn't sinking into the dark abyss right now.  
  
He heard a small hum from the figure next to him and took it as a signal to continue his thoughts.  
  
“I got it, I was prepared for the way my parent's reacted. What I didn't expect though, was that my sister... how could she side with them? She was so hurtful. I feel like I just lost my only ally in this fight, like a piece of me has been torn from my chest.” Kibum said, his voice raised in pitch considerably towards the end of the sentence as he finally stopped with a small crack in his voice.  
  
It was at that moment that Kibum felt a tentative but reassuring hand being placed between his shoulder blades. He felt as Jonghyun's hand moved in warm soothing circles as he breathed in deeply to try and push down his tears. He had cried enough already, he wasn't about to start again in front of Jonghyun.  
  
“W-why can't she accept me Jjong? H-h-how c-could she...?” and the tears finally fell as he looked into Jonghyun's brown and unwavering eyes. He turned his body to sob into his boyfriend's shoulder, his gasps punctuating the air so loudly that he was afraid he might wake all of the sleeping birds in the park. His feet were wet and uncomfortable, he ran from his parent's house without grabbing his shoes as his sister's painful words pierced through his heart. He could hear them now, they were screaming and shouting inside his head. Over and over like a mantra or a broken disc, he couldn't quiet them, even as he pushed his ear against Jonghyun's strong neck forcefully. Then he felt two strong arms embrace him and pull him tighter.  
  
“Shhhh, it's okay to cry Bummie. Cry as much as you want, as much as you need. I'm not going anywhere.” Jonghyun whispered into his ears and Key was grateful for the noise as it helped to drown out all of his ugly thoughts.  
  
Jonghyun didn't know how long he spent by the river that day, just holding the younger boy and trying to tell him that everything would be okay. He didn't know that, how could he say everything would be okay? But he said it anyway, he believed in positive thinking and that they could weather any storm as long as they were together.  
  
Jonghyun remembered picking up a worn out Kibum, feeling his icy cold feet against his upper thighs as he piggybacked him up the hill and across the park. The younger boy was still shivering from head to toe even when Jonghyun had changed his clothes and placed him into their warm bed. Theirs... Jonghyun thought wistfully, it should be a great feeling to be able to call it by that name but he knew deep down that Kibum wanted acceptance. He wanted the family that had stood by his side for years. He wanted the mother that raised him, to love him regardless of his lifestyle choices but Jonghyun couldn't give him that. He was sure though, that he would offer Kibum a safe place, a home and a warm bed because even though it wasn't his real home yet... maybe, just maybe, he could learn to love it just as much.  
  
The sun was warming his tanned skin. The sounds of children playing and splashing around in the water finally filtered into Jonghyun's mind and brought him back to the present day.  
  
With a sad smile, Jonghyun watched his boyfriend laying on the sand just a few feet away. Key was reading his book and laughing to himself at, apparently, amusing parts. He remembered that moment from the past as clearly as yesterday and although his heart still ached at not being able to bring back his lover's family, he was sure and content that Kibum still had everything he needed. Jonghyun had his best friend and lover by his side and despite all of the ups and downs, everything worked out in the end. Jonghyun was happy because he could finally see that carefree smile on his boyfriend's face.  
  
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-


End file.
